id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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