did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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