He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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