So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
