Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
