How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
