She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
