Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
