What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
