So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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