D3 body, D1 cock
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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