no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
