Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
