Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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