I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
this is an emotional support booty call
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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