Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
