Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i may or may not be watching the land before time
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
