stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
