It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
He had one of those small greek statue penises
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
