i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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