Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
