so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I would fuck him just for his dog
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
