Do vagina's smell?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
