get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
