I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
