I got chris browned last night
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
