i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
