i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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