I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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