we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
