I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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