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I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
