He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
