We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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