she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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