You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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