i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
