I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
