Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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