That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
