Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize