reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
