So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize