He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
