he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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