Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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