I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
