Sponge bath it is.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
