are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
