omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
no more duck duck goose at the bar
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize