dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He better not be in your backpack
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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